I recognise I am very silly and pathetic and immature, but I guess I have the cure for it now.
Writing songs about death, believe me, it works. I've been doing it for several years now and it starts to make an impact on me. It's like with these pills you know, they take longer then you want them to, to actually work. But that's okay, too.
I don't like this image of me being sad and miserable and I don't know why I picture myself like this. I mean (in case somebody's actually really reading this? Thanks mate, and good look, happy birthday or WTF I'm sorry she/he dumbed you) I am a rather positive about stuff. At least I constantly try to. I must seem very differently, because I only "blog" when I feel verrrry very very very down. And this is me in "good shape", whatever that means, my friend.
Ummm, hm...yeah, FORWARD:
The happiest hours in my life have been me going totally nuts on concerts, dancing, screaming, jumping around...Really fun, you should try it. It works better than anything else I've tried. If you're not that "dancing-type" I recommend you to go to a Reggae Concert. There is no standing still. Nobody stands still there. But it's not like MOSHPIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!1CIRCLE PIT!!!!!!!!!!!HELLYEAH!WALLOFDEATH!!!!LET'SHITEACHOTHER!!!!!!!!!!! It's full of harmony. Yes, peace and love etc. You just get into the vibe and start dancing. It's fucking great! Really.
If you're german (like me...don't ask why I pretend I'm english, that's an aestethic thing I guess) go see JAHCOUSTIX. He's the reggae-master.
If you're from the stage go to a JASON WEBLEY show. He's not all that reggae but he is THE VIBE, like really. (pic shown above)
Or if you're not into music or socialising at all (may that be) just go to a place where you love to be. Like the woods or the playground or whatever (excluding your room) and then...you can do a lot of things. Screaming is one thing. It's very helpful. If you cannot scream (there are a lot of people who cannot) than sing (if you can) if not run...if you cannot (maybe you have no legs, I don't know), then breathe in and out. LOUDLY. Because that my friend, is something anybody can do. Because we're alive, for fuck's sake.
I try to remember myself that I am alive.
You should do that, too!